what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
They use the phrase "final warning" so often the words have lost all meaning.
Not cool at all. Last night I organized my condoms by expiration date. I need to get laid.
he had his head down and said he was listening for the buffalo, he had to still be drunk.
I was officially considered the drunkest person in cuba when the bartender at the swim up bar made me wear a life jacket for 'safety purposes'
I'm at your house, laying with your dog, eating taco meat, take your time.
I just bought the ATT family protection plan so that I could block all of my old bar hookups from booty calling me...
We should bet how many people are going to get alcohol poisoning next weekend and whoever wins gets a free Starbucks.
Hey it happens. Think of it this way- you didn't wake up in jail, your face wasn't inexplicably busted and you still have all your teeth. In this group of friends, you're on top!
Is there a non-awkward way to tell a girl I work with that she looks just like my favourite pornstar?
I've started a list of places i want to drink. To go along with the list of places i want to have sex. Lincoln's log cabin is on both.
If she has AMC, I may have to fuck her today. I want to catch up on the walking dead.
She looked up at the menu and yelled this is my absolute favorite literacy
I bought us both waterproof cases so we can sext through FaceTime in the shower.
Next. Level. Shit.
I'm sorry I keep having sex wth your friends. I'm done, for real. Unless cole is interested. Other than that, I'm done.
Randomize
