I feel like our bond as friends is a lot stronger now that I've talked to you on the phone while having sex.
i wish that i had sketchier friends so that it would be easier to get drugs
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
i can't believe you were mixing vodka with green tea last night and enjoying it.
i should bottle and sell it. my slogan could be "green tea vodka. antioxidating while intoxiacting. your liver will thank you. "
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just got to school and somone already mentioned the amount of cereal im carrying.
I just found a GIANT thermos of sangria in my sink. I don't know if its still good to drink, but its good to drink.
No idea how he made them, but vodka water balloons were a horrible idea.
I was passed out in a bathroom stall. Of course im going to look like shit
I know. His dick was small at the top and got bigger at the bottom, like a fucking curling wand.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You'd be proud. Took my birth control today at 12:30 with a Budweiser. Guy across the bar saw and held his bottle up to salute me 😂
It's official cum is not a great leave in conditioner
I dont remember you getting a condom thrown at you. I think I had a concusion
Today will be the day I throw up in my backpack in the middle of class
A lady played my boobs as if they were drums. It's been that kinda night.
Okay she just told me to turn the volume down on the fan. What does this even mean?
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