He's telling me stories about how he made out with a 14 yr old when he was 22. I'm going home.
Another night, another sound of my neighbor almost having an orgasm.
And she used to have such long ones. Sad.
I know we had a good night last night because his turtle was half asleep chewing on the used condom.
every time you want to hook up with a guy who has a girl friend, i'll just give you a freshman
obviously you don't know the college version of myself. if there's something i'm ALWAYS willing to put up for it's alcohol.
ttyl tear gas
Im in his room watching him sleep. Im going to try and jerk off and not get caught by the nurse.
Why are there hooting douchebags outside my building? Did a sport happen again?
I got another blow job proposal last night. Skills.
Ew. He is mine. We all know that if he has a mid-life crisis and decides to sleep with a student, I AM THAT STUDENT. She's not friends with him on FB. Reassuring.
I started crying during a meeting at work and now I'm sitting on my couch drinking boxed wine at 1:30 in the afternoon. Fuck you too estrogen.
What kind of sociopath goes to sleep at 9pm when I clearly need attention
I woke up in a bathtub full of green and blue Nickelodeon slime! wtf?!
He’s definitely circumcised. There’s not enough room in those speedos for a foreskin with that fire hose he’s packing.
Upstairs definitely just had sex while I wrote you love poetry. That was a fun experience 🤷🏻♀️
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