I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
you think thats bad? Today I had to pop a zit on my sack.
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
Truelife: I made out with my ex-boyfriend's girlfriend this weekend. Thank you Captain Morgan...
Was she wearing cherry chapstick??
No. Life's not always a fairytale.....
i just realized i put more money and effort into 420 then i did for christmas
We need to stop sleeping with people based on which NFL team they like.
My mom's 50 year old alcoholic friend just told me about how she was more whoreish then us at our age. Challenge accepted.
all I wanna do is swim in an Olympic sized pool of Gatorade and tylenol.
Wake your ass up this is a day of horror where we get horroibly drunk and sleep with tandom dudes who wish they were super heros ps i havr stuffed animals over my privates im a petting zoo this year
We were high as shit. We argued for like ten minutes about going to Dunkin Donuts and then just ended up rolling down hills. Thanks for the weed.
You have all semester to unpack your car, quarter jello shots only last until 10.
If I could drink as much and have the amount of sex he has at his age, well I'd probably be dead
Does he know you were at a strip club taking shots of tequila right before you babysat his son?
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
We really gotta wear capes to the bar more often...
Randomize
