Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
You broke a window with your face. I don't think the landlord will be as impressed as we were.
There is a keg full of gin. THERE SHOULD NEVER EVER BE A KEG FULL OF GIN.
On a positive note, new entry in my phone as 'HOT ASS, DOWN TO FUCK'. idk if its a boy or girl tho.
Update, its a couple
Bottle rocket just missed my head by about 3 inches. Of course I'm being safe
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
Memorial weekend is going to be amazeballs. Jungle juice, drunk guys, and my vagina being stimulated by the vibrations of a 4 wheeler. I mean there is no way that can go wrong.
Typcal friday morning so far. Puke, shower, commute/puke, coffee, puke, coffee, bagel, good to go. Lunch today?
I swear if she asks me for a baby one more time I'm gonna sleep with one of her friends
She insisted we fuck to Ludacris, not how I imagined popping her lesbian cherry would be. I tried delt and I liked it.
I smell like hot dogs and captain morgan it's 11:20 am what is my life
My new boobs got me 12 drinks at the concert. Whose the real winner here?
Stop calling him just to say, "my vagina misses you."
CUT OFF ALL YOUR HAIR COME ON MAN LET'S DO THIS
Sooo I ended up ugly crying at the drive thru window at 10 pm last night....how was your valentine's day?
Well what did you order
Randomize
