Of course im so fucked up sarah. I fight away tornadoes.
I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
Who was more unwelcome: The two of us at the party last night, or Kimmy Gibler at the Tanner residence?
he came over wasted, used the bathroom, drank some water, and fell asleep holding my hand. what kind of a fuck buddy does that??
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
one of the service guys here said i licked ranch off your face lastnight
So befoe we go on this mission how reliable are you for bailing peope out of jail
It's been two days. My balls feel like watermelons.
He said i looked like a shooting star sprawled out on the floor while i puked and i kept blaming "senor cuervo" for doing me dirty.
We didn't have a blender so we made the margaritas by running over a garbagebag full of ice with the car and then stirring it with a knife in a French-press coffee pot. CAN YOU SAY RESOURCEFUL?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Smuggling a beer bottle full of vodka out of the bar with a tampon as a plug for the top of the bottle wasn't one of my classiest ideas... but your hangover proves it was resourceful and effective. Your welcome.
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
Drinking ketchup directly out of the bottle does not make it tomato juice.
well at least now you can say you got an STD from the frontman of a band no one's heard of
fuck you.
Call me Sherlock Holmes, bitch.
I’ve got a closet full of cosplay outfits and horny boytoy to help me ride out this pandemic
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