she was left over bi-product, like the hotdog of the human race
around noonish you got carried out for spitting water and throwing cups at old people...
No, I don't think Michelle is a squirter. And if I've had anal sex, the Obamas have.
if u cant get laid at this wedding we need to have a looooooong talk about the possibility of u becoming a lesbian
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
we've called him dos banos ever since he threw up in 2 separate bathrooms with the same puke
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
his finger was half off and he was more concerned that he wasnt at home shooting cucumbers out of his potato gun.
It happened again.
What?
I lost in a drinking contest with my 84 year old grandmother. Two years in a row now.
I'm eating tortillas right now. Like not cooked tortillas. Someone is playing the guitar. Man with bandana.
If I spent my amateur stripper money does that mean I am cleansed of my sins?
Tequila ran out around 11 so she let them do body shots of chips and guacamole instead
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
First night of sleeping in the same bed, and she farted on me. I immediately excused myself and went home. Don't know if we're still together. Will update you.
They both showed up at the same time... to surprise me. One had flowers and the other had chocolates. Needless to say, I will be at the bar all weekend long trying to figure out how this happens.
Randomize
