Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
last night you decided it was time to "get organized" and "straighten out your life." You pulled out a bag of troll dolls, sorted through them and got nostalgic. You demanded both andy and i take one and keep it forever.
I realized courtney is my jiminy cricket but instead of preventing me from telling lies she prevents me from fucking strangers
Graduating is kinda bittersweet. Now I'm gonna have to find another excuse to day-drink and sleep until 3pm besides "I'm in college."
Just met another girl you fucked but this time in seattle. Your cock gets almost as much mileage as jet blue. Anaheim and seattle both say hi, figured you don't remember their names.
Apparently I yelled "no stop it" in my sleep last night when he tried to cuddle with me.
Oops, guess its official. I just use him for sex.
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
The sun is gonna brush it's hairy dick across my forehead in the morning, gently whispering: "you're 4 hours late for work"
You tried to fight everyone, so we kept having her take her shirt off. You were sufficiently distracted...
I ate you ate to the whole david gray album
You are the jesus of drinking
I hope I don't have to wait for another triple crown winner to get laid again.
He is a sex God. It lasted more than an hour, and I don't remember how many times I came. I lost count at 57.
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
I have to close one eye, because I don't wanna see two movies, I only want to see one.
Randomize
