He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
If I pass out leave the food near me so i can wake up to it
a girl just showed up to class in a zip up hoddie and sweat pants. said she over slept. i guess she got hot and unzipped it , it was only then she realized was sleeping without a shirt or bra.
you kept spraying the cat with water and then telling it to "man up" when it cried
I'm out of vodka and money. My semester is officially over. The way I see it, my finals are just forms I need to fill out in order to leave campus.
he was terrible at kissing, so i just kept letting him motorboat me. he seemed very pleased with my choice
She bought a fucking hedgehog. And that's just the tip of the crazy iceberg.
how did we start talking about space blow jobs?
My penis just literally said "Yaaaaaay!!!" It's the first time it's spoken out loud. Before this we could only communicate through rudimentary sign language
Bitch, he is not your friend and this is not Bravo. Get in this car before you get smacked
The bend and snap? 98% success rate of getting attention. When used appropriately, it has an 83% rate of return on a dinner invitation.
I'm having a hard time existing right now. When I figure out how it works ill be over.
Well I've made a drinking game out of the Wiggles but I think I've got this babysitting thing down
He shit in the fireplace
We lost a person.... if you see a man in yellow shorts and nothing else walking around let me know...
Randomize
