We should be called the Road Head Warriors
One of my students just said I have "big mommy parts". Even third graders know that my tits are too big. God I love em.
i did the responsible thing and pissed myself...
What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
In the library. Still drunk. Shoes missnig. Term paper due in fiften minutes. Iff I puke u think theyll throw me out?
Our kitchen sink faucet is leaking, so I set a pitcher under it to catch water for Kool-Aid tomorrow rather than turn on the faucet. The environment owes me.
may have given a homeless man 70 dollars in exchange for his sandals. so yea, i'm going as jesus for next halloween.
New high score, I made the stripper choke me while I was getting a lap dance last night
It was like the devil him self busted his red hot satanic nuts all over my face and burned my eyes out of my innocent sockets.
I heard you shushing me, but my screaming orgasm drowned it out.
Cause I know you wanna ride the D like a Vespa in ROMAN HOLIDAY
U know this is gone far when im in the bathroom trying to take a pic of my asshole
Can you explain the Transformers set up for battle in my living room?
I'm seriously considering starting a savings account so I'll have bail money this summer.
She's chasing the cat around the house hitting it with a cardboard sword yelling "there can be only one!"
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