His mom made me a necklace that i am supposed to wear to prom. She included a note with it, which had a star trek quote. What have I gotten myself into?
my clit piercing makes the metal detector go off
And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The only thing I can remember you saying is "I won't cut pizza like this when I'm older."
If fate has that penis in my future.....I'm down.
i have a wrist watched drawn on my wrist that it says shot o clock
Yes. Be the home wrecker you've always dreamed of being.
I just dropped $300 on lingerie. He better rip this off with his teeth.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Told my brother the truth how I meet her...I grabbed the first thing I could when the cops came. 10 months later we are engaged.
This wouldn't be the first time my boss has seen me topless
Pretty sure one of my drivers stopped to get laid while he was delivering a pizza. Is it appropriate to give him a write-up AND a high-five?
She just kept roaring and saying Katy Perry had nothing on her. Wtf did she take?
I need to stop acting like a porn star that isn't getting paid
The night got way more interesting after Jimmy started doing summersaults in front of the bar.
Randomize