But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
She's good at three things and two of them involve dicks. And other one involves her love for arts
Have you asked your drug dealer if he wants to see harry potter with you?
Do you think county jail has a Groupon?
Haha. Fifty shades ain't got shit on me. My tits look like they got in a fight.
Well five day drinking adventure in appreciation of cinco de drinko under the belt, great way to start may
What kind of sociopath goes to sleep at 9pm when I clearly need attention
I love standing in line at rite aid for 10 minutes being forced to talk to my ex's mom about life while I'm holding nothing but yeast infection cream
His truck was very sexy. Unfortunately, shortly thereafter, I discovered that the whole overcompensating thing is very true...
I've made a new rule for socializing in the winter: if it doesn't involve me orgasming or getting drunk I can't make it
I wonder how vigorously I can jack off in a one person tent without being noticed???
sam was dropping a deuce next to me. wrote me a note that said "glad we shared this experience." passed it under the wrong stall. the other guy picked it up. that's all I know so far.
The waxing lady fingered me during my brazilian. 40 dollars well spent
I broke my dick don't ask me how I need help putting in a catheter so I can piss.
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