I just shaved my legs while pooping. classy or trashy?
talent.
Just got caught pissing on a plant in her room while she was in the shower first word out of my mouth were my bad
I'm so cold I just used my boobs to keep my face warm
just had cupcakes and mountain dew for dinner-now i'm playing super mario brothers. 10 year olds all over the world would kill to be me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i wish i could tell you the night didnt begin with me drinking alone
watching my parents drink 4 loko out of usf cups playing pool and rocking out to ACDC...
Can I come live with you?
We totally just fucked in a closet. These vacations with his family are causing creativity I never thought I had.
So the coke mirror was perfectly angeled at my face right when i woke up this morning. I now know how I'd look on intervention.
I drove your lawn mower home. Hope you don't need it tonight. I'll bring it over tomorrow.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just got a message on OkCupid from a 20-year-old who has "Momma's Boy" tattoed across his chest and thinks the earth is bigger than the sun.
No. Every time we go there, you end up getting high, then lost, then going home with strangers.
We work out, have really intense sex, and then eat cereal marketed for children. We have a system, okay?
its not everyday you see batman on the ground with someone riverdancing on his face bourbon street never disappoints
my dry spell has ended & now it's like a tsunami of dick i can't handle it
Why is the floor coated in a 2 inch blanket of popcorn??
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