Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
Just shot my load on a stink bug. Thought you should know.
im not an educated person. i just do things. and it works out in my favor
You kept excitedly announcing to the bar what time it was. Followed by an equally excited "Clock language still makes sense!"
Decided against hooking up with creepy stalker guy for a ride to work. I feel I've earned a few self respect points back.
We told our cab driver we'd give him 3 grand if he pit maneuvered you guys in your cab.
I plan on showing these boobs to so many people that by the end of it ill just have a shirt of beads.
Is the mullet a good, great, or horrible idea before we leave for college
I made out with a guy because he ate a grape lollipop and he tasted delicious... not my proudest moment.
My doctor said I can only have one drink at a time, ever, from now on. My life has officially started its decline.
I'll just bring the big suitcase this trip so I don't have to play wine bottle tetris again.
how do you know everyone's mad at you?
I just woke up feeling shameful
Had a one night stand and didnt remember the guys name until he started sending me poems in the mail.
My penis is lonely
So is my ring finger
Randomize
