Why do I feel like I used to feel when I almost got caught looking at porn when I get caught looking at facebook at work
she complimented my bra when we were hooking up. this lesbian thing has its upsides
The extent of my physical activity is running from the cops.
She offered to massage my back by hitting it with a sparkly purple double dildo... Bi chicks can get creepy
My mom and dad are smoking a joint while lecturing me on what to bring and how to act in Europe. I'll finish this glass of wine and head over.
Last time I get high to write a paper the night before it's due. "Tiny Wings and sexuality" is not an acceptable topic to for a paper. Class in 30 minutes. I'm fucked...
He told me to put on my big boy pants, then take them off and fuck her before he smacks me with a chair. His pep talks suck.
You're not horrible. Thank you for my pandas.
The horniest man in the world doesn't want sex as bad as I want pizza right now.
Definitely! I will do that this week. Right now, watching drag queens play with my dad's beard.
It's been awhile, you pregnant yet?
We kind of crashed their funeral party. Oops.
He got you flowers. How bad can the sex really be?
U NO SLUT. YOUR HEART IS JUST FREE.
True college students do jello shots in the library
Randomize
