yo dude i was totally schwabbin last night.
what does that even mean?
you ever see those charles schwabb commercials, where the people are like half cartoon half real.... well yeah i saw that in real life.
I vaguely remember telling people they were not trash cans
We all have a cross to bear. Yours just happens to be attracting gay men.
MISSING: One left eyebrow. Reward if returned.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I didnt think the feeling of accomplishment for fucking brothers would be this great.
according to the video, you won you first drunken karaoke contest based off of your actual singing abilities and not because you took your shirt! I've never been prouder :)
I look like I just got gang banged and I'm wearing a Taylor swift t shirt. It's not gonna be a pretty breakfast.
The horniest man in the world doesn't want sex as bad as I want pizza right now.
Just used my eyelash curler to open a bottle of cider...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A guy in a gorilla mask got blown on the lawn. And then the night got weird.
These are the last few fleeting sober moments of the day for me. If there is anything you need me to do today, please tell me now
That reminds me of the morning I woke up on the sidewalk covered in chicken wings
It's a weird kind of sexy when a guy has a bunkbed with his roommate
This is what I get for listening to Christians.
100000% expect a picture of my ass in them
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