And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
it only takes four glasses of wine for me to ride an elephant with a stranger.
My vag wants to play a game of hungry hungry hippos with your cock.
At the end of the night you handed the bartender a piece of paper with the word "VISA" written on it.
I just feel like Im gonna be remembered as that one RA guy that used to sell weed
I feel like we should at least be hungover if we're gonna be this grown up.
Apparently coming home smelling like I took a bath in beer is frowned upon in this household. I'm so glad I don't actually live here.
No it was good. I serenaded the holding cell occupants with a fabulous rendition of Making Love out of Nothing at all. It was fucking amazing!
I woke up naked on my couch playing a video game I thought I had dreamed about... oh yeah, and someone cut my hair.
You were spooning an empty magnum of white wine in the middle of the bed so I slept on the couch
Well at least there's no more confusion about your place in my life. Wine > pizza > your dick > the rest of you.
Love you...
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
well, you know. whores of a feather.
Okay well for one he didn't speak any english but before any happened he made me use the translator to consent
If I'm legally allowed to go to jail than I should legally be allowed to tell a cop to fuck off. Basic principles.
Yea, but did you really have to throw a sandwich at him??
Thanks. I just smoked a bowl topless so I'm in heaven right now.
Randomize
