I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
Was just explained ingredients in a four loko. Puzzles of the universe starting to piece together.
It's shit like that that makes me wish being deaf was contagious
Just did a line with lance bass. Only in NY
the last guy with this job had a bookshelf fall on him. He's in the Er. Im high and they gave me his shift. How do you think i feel?
I'm riding shot gun after Shawn took a dump in a happy meal box because we were making record time.
I NEED TO GET TO THE PLAYGROUND. I JUST NEED TO SWING. IF I SWING MAYBE THE SMELL WILL COME OFF OF ME. I NEED TO SWING
Out of all the people in the house to show their tits at mcdonalds to try and get free food, they picked those two?
Is it possible to rally from a drunken seizure?
MY MOM IS GOING TO SMOKE WITH ME.
SHE'S GOING TO SMOKE HIGH QUALITY MARIJUANA WITH ME.
woke up next to the new dishwasher. set the record for banging a new employee to 6 hours...i should be a professional sexual predator
Yeah I mean once a gun is being waved around, its probably a good time to leave the party
But the music was sooo good
Let it be known that on this day, the 26th of October, in the year 2016, I successfully put both of his balls in my mouth at once.
I need to go home for the safety of everyone in a 10 mile radius, especially me
Last night I drank three beers and threw up in a tree house. I am ashamed.
Randomize
