O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
I didn't take her seriously until she snorted that ramen noodle flavor packet...
You went around chanting "dinosaur period" and drinking tomato soup from the can.
I put the condom across her upper lip. It was like a mustache of a job well done.
I don't have any money, so I'm just gonna press my boobs against him for his birthday.
There is a chick wearing some guy's shirt wrapped around her waist as a skirt... She's flashing her panties to everyone as she sings karaoke. You need to get here.
Kellie accidentally ran into the car with two teenagers making out. made a big thud. there was a loud scream and she was gone...haven't seen her since
Dude, you were tagged in a stripper FB selfie. That is a whole new level of something.....
Best part of leaving the university? Interns are as hot as my former students, not legally off limits, and they will do anything for a full time job.
How the fuck am I supposed to enjoy a third ice day from school if I only bought enough alcohol for 2?
I don't know, maybe act like an adult who teaches children for a living
It's like we're not even friends
That moment when you can't decide if you should vote for the random frat guy you have head to at the beginning of the semester for business and technology senator.
I have a bottle of vodka wrapped in a leg warmer in my purse. This is what it takes to get through Christmas with my family.
i also remember watching someone vomit off a balcony which was kind of grim
All our friends are getting married, and I'm the dateless guy bringing molly to their weddings.
What happened last night? All I know is that I walked into class this morning and everyone was chanting my name.
Randomize
