wow wtf my bar tab was 80 dollars
IT WAS DOLLAR BEER NIGHT
Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
i can't wait to kiss dudes with my vampire teeth in.
There's a walmart bag of my vomit outside my front door. I just really need someone to appreciate that with me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i convinced her that her period would come back if we did it doggy style
you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
God damn. I'm really starting to resent babies. They're everywhere. Like fucking land mines.
This must be what defeat feels like to Tom Brady today. I bet he wishes he could barf up all of his bad decisions from yesterday, too.
Like sorry you chose to have an attractive girlfriend dude
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I've forgotten how to blink. Help plz?
lets go to sea world and you can just hit on every guy in a wetsuit until you get lucky
He told me I'm a small core of pure evil wrapped up in sweetness, gold, and puppies. He gets me.
That is beautiful
Just cropdusted a little kid that wouldn't get out of my way in Kroger. Welcome to the real world bitch.
I may have just got motorboated by a male stripper who told me I should be a porn star and not a vet student.
She grinded so hard on my face that I've got rugburn on both eyelids
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