I'm a simple man, with a social life most psychopaths would cringe at
I'm smoking weed out of a trumpet
I just did a slip and slide down the hall way of my apartment building
Tie
Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
Your mom is more observant then Randy Newman.
i dont care about people's attitudes as long as they give me head
Well the party says they're going to have three kegs and four trampolines. I think I'm going to invite my EMT buddies just to be safe.
I decided to follow my clitoris instead of my heart.
He ended up walking out of his bedroom and told me to look at the nonexistent fire he was holding in his hand. Im upset I didn't take those shrooms.
i told you that I felt like my feet were melting into the ground and you starting blowing on them to put out the "invisible fire". thanks friend.
We've been here for ten minutes. She told me I wasn't "Irish enough", licked my tits, and then sprinkled green glitter on them.
During sex his mom asks from the other side of the door, "Do you like avocados?" Who doesn't like avocados?
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
So I sniffed too hard this morning before work and I THINK THE COCAINE JUST STARTED ROUND 2.
Apparently walking into a national conference and proclaiming "i'm here to fuck shit up" is frowned upon.
Who knew?
I really wish you were home bc youre the only friend I could ask to use an at home waxing kit on my vagina. I need you.
Randomize
