I hate ducks.
What?
they're sketch. like squirrels. squirrels are sketch as fuck.
Turns out you can't chew it over with twix in real life
Dude I've never seen anyone get slapped that hard
The state of Wisconsin is just irresponsible for letting me buy this many fireworks
How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just remembered our "im drunk enough to look at your vagina" conversation. Is that offer still valid? I really think I need a second opinion
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
I just found a casserole dish in my oven filled with broken glass, blood, and chopsticks. And the REALLY fucked up thing is that finding it answered more questions than it raised.
She sucks. And I almost hooked up with a clown last night
Then you jumped in the pool because your were convinced the scratches on your neck from the cat were gills and you could breathe underwater.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I swear she looks like a sloth.... I'll toss a coin...
If by "Are you drunk?" you mean "Did you just faceplant in the checkout line at Target?" the answer is yes.
nothing says "fuck you jocks from high school my life is better than yours" like bringing 5 grand in 20s to the bar
Is there a hallmark card for "could you please slide the FUCK out of my DMs"....?
I love how u said nothing about the sidewalk sex but refused shower sex
I offered to go down on her because of how impressive her theatre career was. Stop letting me talk to lesbians.
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