so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
I didnt expect it either. But she was there and I had a boner, so i made it happen.
the last thing i remember is you screaming lets hunt humans.
the cops didnt even wait to start drinking the confiscated alchohol from the party
All she does is lay in bed and watch golden girls and masturbate all day...
It's inspiring.
He was going down on me and raised up for a minute, slipped and punched me in the face. My lady boner left immediately.
Oh my god I'm so bored. The virgin is so disinteresting when I'm not trying to cum on her face.
Send me the video of myself under the polar bear skin. It's important.
Dude. That is just waaaay to much random to process after that tequila battle.
I was doing drugs in the men's room so my employee went in to the woman's for the same reason but left proof and got caught. Had to fire him cuz I bogarted his dope spot. Awesome.
You know what the worst feeling in the world is? Sitting in your 6pm AA meeting still hungover from the night before
And I was like "take off the damn flower crown, we're about to have sex not post an indie picture on tumblr"
why not an indie porn pic then
Because cocaine and lesbian hookups on a Tuesday cannot be the new normal
People like you and me aren't meant to go this long without having sex
Judging from the sharpie on my face, glitter on my chest and women's tiger print panties i'm wearing last night was a thing.
Randomize
