shes hot in the i'd deny it if anyone asked kinda way
forget your mom, you can see her anytime. A one night stand only happens ONE night.
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
my Econ professor just passed around his phone for us to take a pic of ourselves so he could learn our names. I am currently looking him up on my sex offenders app.
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
You broke out your mechano set and told us you were gonna "build us a beer machine" and 5 min later you were fast asleep
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
what's the name of the guy at the bank you blew to get the lower interest rate?
um. wrong number, but good luck with your loan
This girl caught me staring at the cat but stroking the computer because it was closer, which is why I hate blunts.
Walking out of our apartment this morning to go to class, I saw a sticky note on the front door that said "get tested." The door was unlocked so did you bring some stranger back last night? I'm assuming you weren't referring to me...
The funny part was that the cop pulled us over cause the park was closed, not because I had just come up from giving the guy a blowjob when the cop drove by.
He texted his hospitalized grandma while inside me, so really a perfect gentleman.
Enjoy the penises
His cat just sat there and simultaneously bobbed his head up and down while I blew him
Well this guy just went into a detailed lecture about how rinos are developing into unicorns.. It's gonna be a good night.
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