new revelation: five guys for breakfast
new revelation: previous revelation not a good revelation
Her sex list was a LOT longer than mine. She tried to justify it by saying '4 of those don't count because they were in the gang bang'.
i woke up, turned over, and noticed an assortment of knives stuck in my wall. i should prob stop drinking
Man, jail baloney is awful.
I gotta shower this stuff off me I'm starting to hear baby kittens in the toilet tank again..
I didn't know he had a girlfriend until after we had sex when he said, "Man I really gotta stop cheating on my girlfriend."
I couldn't do it. You can't break up after that many orgasms. It's physically impossible.
the day has come. I have finally reached the point in my life where I just don't give a fuck about anything anymore. it's beautiful!
My horseshoe mustache feels at home at this bar.
You're doing screenings before you set me up again- no child sized dicks allowed.
He's just been a dick since he set his face on fire. I just wanted to eat a fucking hot dog.
If my dildo had feelings, they. Would've deffinately been hurt. He put that toy to shame..
I got confused. The music was loud, porn was playing, people were grinding, there were hand jobs.
So, I think my BF has slept with several of our sorority sisters
Well, now that you know, yes he has. We didn’t say anything because you seemed so happy. He’s a great guy and none of us have any hard feelings, but yeah, we’re all very familiar with his penis and it’s talents
It should be perfectly legal to tase anyone not wearing a mask.
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