At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
He just kept muttering to himself "stabby stabby stabby stabby" while we were boning. I will never be boning him again.
i just got cum up my nose. i would have expected more from the captain of the men's lacrosse team
you figure out which one you wanna sleep with, & I'll sleep with the other one. problem solved
at least the cop wrote "happy birthday" on the ticket.
I'm still tasting pancake mix. I think this may actually be a serious medical problem...
There's a baby duck in my toilet. Fuck you.
I have poison ivy and a broken finger. Don't have a threesome in the woods.
You used your chihuahua as a pillow screaming "HE'S A PILLOW AND A PET" and proceeded to puke in the dog bed
"I'm pretty sure all our toasts were to Ben Afflecks penis last night."
Wait wait wait. You are actually taking advice from this lunatic?
This is the girl who got a balloon full of cocaine through security no questions asked. Of course I'm taking her advice.
Valid.
So being hungover in an office full of people with hangovers for 9 hours is quite possibly what hell will be like.
No, this year you're all getting coupons for things like "no yelling because you had sex in my apartment" or "the last beer."
Randomize
