He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
Nothing makes my dick softer than hot girls in rain boots.
i gave you head in a backbend. if that doesnt say happy birthday i dont know what does.
he left his wallet here so lets treat ourselves to a lunch for the lack of penis we both had deal with
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Wasn't a date. In exchange for artichoke dip I received a bj. And sex. It was a transaction.
I like to think of them as justice herpes. She cheats on me and gets more than she bargained for.
Whoever decided it was a good idea to sell 40's at a bar with life-sized jenga deserves a nobel prize.
to whom it may concern. if i am dead in colleens bed it is not her fault i slept in my scarf. my dads middle name is ronald.
Pretty sure I just convinced a drunk guy at the train station that I was from the future
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There are 18k people at the game and I'm next to the one guy who pulls his underwear down to his ankles to piss.
We opted you as the sacrificial dick tonight. We need our patron cafe. Go make some moves.
Also, feel like I need to install a nanny cam to remind myself what I did the night before.
Do not tell me I cant do drunk math ever again, AND I made a creative way of telling him I want him to fuck me.
I'm currently watching porn and playing beer pong with wine in the lobby of a hotel with a squadron of hot airforce guys. You can never say your life is better than mine again
last night i was way too drunk and i was forcing people to let me tell them about mammals
Randomize