We had to be out of the dorms at 730. Meeting started at 8. I woke up at 948. Drunk and covered in glitter.
I just remembered we said the Lord's Prayer before we went out last night.
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
OMG HE JUST PUKED WITH THE DOOR OPEN WHILE DRIVING ON THE ROAD AND OMG WE NEED TO CHAT BUT NOT ATM CAUSE THERES PUKE ON MY PHONE
Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
on the way to the hospital you kept asking if we could stop at the bar first. then you proceeded to puke out the window
Still trying to wash and scratch the glitter off of my dick. That stripper should be banned.
I wonder when walk of shame thursdays in the rain will finally make me stop drinking.
i’m not very adjusted to having free time. for example, I forgot how much fun it is to masturbate.
I don't have to hold her hair back as she blows me but I do have to hold the ball on the Santa hat
My neck is PURPLE. This is NOT a good day to be indoctrinated by the cardinal...
I swear to god if you keep eating my cats food drunk I am going to kick you out of our apartment.
They had an Olympic theme party at her work yesterday. She brought home her fake gold medal and hung it on my cock after she rode me.
Why is there a waffle in the knife drawer?
The real question is why are there knives in the waffle drawer.
Randomize