I don't make mistakes...just understandable bad choices.
Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
im in a kiddie pool, high, with a keg in arms reach. If i had a sandwich and a blowjob this would be the best day ever
im as drunk as the barefoot contessa. GET TO MY LEVEL
dude. stop pregaming the food network.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i feel so shallow. people in iran are using twitter to write hardcore nathan hale shit about dying for freedom. my last tweet was "i hate the taco shits"
So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
Did you get your crutches off the street sign?
If you like her enough, bring her with. If not, eloquently cunt punt that bitch through the field goals of life.
On another note, why did I wake up wrapped in bubble wrap. I can only assume it was for my own safety
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just saw a douchebag with frosted tips & a LaCoste polo with popped collar driving a Call of Duty edition Jeep. It was a cavalcade of stereotypes.
FALSE ALARM! I didn't piss myself, I fell asleep in the shower and then drunkingly crawled into my bed
This is a whole new generation of premature ejaculators
He initiated the conversation by sending me a picture of his penis at 4 am
wait. i have to tell u something. and it has nothing to do with dildos or spiders
It’s just a penis. It’s like every other penis except it’s not the one you’re married to. Ride it or don’t ride it, but don’t agonize about it
Your not going to hell because you need some strange and the neighbor noticed you look damn good in a bikini
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