He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
WHY DID I DRINK ALL THE INGREDIENTS FOR VOMIT?!
My parents came down to check and make sure I wasn't into any mischief then proceeded to give me alcohol.
I just saw a guy give a mop to his fat wife and say "Look, an exercise stick!"
Everything we own is covered in grass and KY
no its okay don't call 911, she's alive. just stopped by her house and banged on her door. she said she turned her phone off because she "had to be alone with her shame and embarassment". typical.
You sucked the drug dealers dick for a 20 of coke...?
Nooo, I payed for that. I sucked his dick because I had an urge.
Remember that crazy chick I've been ignoring and said I wouldn't bang her again? Can we start that again part today?
We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
I have got to stop making out with redheads. I need to sign my life over to my dad like Britney Spears.
So topless strobe light beer pong turned into me rugby tackling a bitch to the ground.my tits will never forgive me for sacrificing their majesticness for responsibility
My mom said she saw you at the grocery store. Said you looked like you were "headed for a Lindsay Lohan quarter life crisis of sorts"
Nothing like a little chlamydia diagnosis to ring in the new year
Ok next time we are filming it. You bring the camera and I'll buy more socks
Like at first he was barely doing anything. So I was like harder and then holy shit he's like going all HULK SMASH on my vagina. I mean it felt fucking awesome. BUT STILL
Randomize
