i hope your v-card owns a pair of floaties
Instead of centeral air we are getting a margaritaville machine. Thought you would enjoy our logic
At least our walk of shames never included a bag of chips and a jar of queso..
Wat the fuck dude ketchup in my bong???
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know what to think. Also, I decided to take a bath...sorry in advance if I flood the bathroom.
I shit you not. I was sitting on Brian's balcony...still drunk from the night before, and a hummingbird flew onto the patio, stared me right in the face and flew away. I feel like it was God's way of telling me, "Stop drinking."
Was so close to hoppin on it but then I realize it's not a dick and I needed to keep walking. Primal instincts.
I just want to give face wipes a shout out for being there when im too tired or high to wash my face at night
I'm by myself. some Midwest chick is hitting on me because I gave her a deviled egg. I need the distraction.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just woke up in the closet wearing nothing but a Santa hat.
Also fuck yeah conspiracy
Whatever he got a sick blow job and his high school fantasy was fulfilled
And that's what dreams are made of
*hilary duff crying in the background*
random boy in my bed. last night wasnt a dream. fuck.
He told you he loved you. Then you wanted to find a chainsaw to cut his dick off.
we're tipping the strippers with chocolate coins.
Randomize