I think you blew our chances when you yelled "YOU SLUTS COMING TO THE TITTIE BAR?" in their face
we are both sitting on my bed desperately refreshing the order tracking page for dominos.
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
I can't tell you details but at one point I had her pee strapped to my back in a ziploc
She came to class yesterday wearing a shirt saying Maybe Partying Will Help. Showed up to class today and puked three times.
If I have to masturbate more than twice a week you fail as a fuck buddy. Just so you know...................you failed
I just woke up from quarter beer tuesdays wearing 3 pairs of underwear, none of which are the ones I left wearing...2 Around my waist and one around my shoulder in an attempt at a bra. At least drunk me tries to be decent?
At some point during thanksgiving the image of me pooping on ur moms chest will come to you. Your welcome!
cops woke me up on the sidewalk and asked where my shoes are.. fuck if i know, im sleeping on the sidewalk! actually i didnt say that, i just cried until they gave me a ride home.
I chose not to drink last night but drinking chose me
If it makes you feel any better they literally are drinking alcohol out of a toilet. They are serving drinks out of a nasty ass toilet...!
We were high and the scary movies were scaring us too bad. Were all watching porn instead now
Bad part of last night: I puked in my hair. Good part of last night: I assembled a posse.
You kept pulling me aside saying "look what I found"
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
Fuck this virus. We’re finally back on campus but the bars suck parties are banned sports are canceled we eat in our rooms and can’t fucking hangout with anyone. I’m tired of virtual classes and involuntary celibacy
OMG IKR! It’s not college unless we’re puking in a toilet wondering if we’re pregnant or just hungover!
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