Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
Hey I found a place that'll do a hand job for 42 bucks
It was like a little tadpole swimming in the big ocean.
There is a pink thong attached to a bottle of svedka hanging from my ceiling fan..is this yours?
could you please not use my mortar and pestal for its intended purpose? i just snorted cracked black pepper.
Shot gunning beers for breakfast. You better be ready for today.
i think they forgot i was still in the room... she grabbed his balls and said "i feel a fire coming on".
the bruise you left on my ass looks like africa. the other just looks like a hand.
My 16 year old neighbor is throwing a rager cuz her parents are out of town and my brother and I are sitting on the porch listening to A) someone fuck on the trampoline B) a girl bawling about her parents finding out C) someone puking in what we think is the hot tub. And overall we take a shot everytime someone says "bra"
Somehow she is more off limits now than when she was his girlfriend
My vagina is no longer accepting new clients.
I just pulled back the shower curtain to reveal Cinnamon Toast Crunch and a spoon in the bathtub. Ambien is a hell of a drug.
She's currently singing "I'm gonna keep on lovin you" to her pillow. How do you think tonight went?
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
I hooked up with the sexiest couple in the LAX BATHROOM IN THE CHANGING FAMILY ROOM HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA
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