So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
We are NOT roofying him just to get him to pass out so we can build a masive snow cock in his yard.
who put toothpaste on EVERY doorknob in my house?!
I was the last girl at the bar last night. It was like a battle royale between 10 guys.
This whole night would have been avoided if the liquor store had air heads
malibu coconut giveth, and malibu coconut taketh away
she sent me pictures of 3 different vaginas and if I could pick which one was hers i could sleep with her.
I was always good at matching as a child.
walk of shame this morning involved walking through the in-home daycare that she runs while it was full of kids. judgemental little shits. on a plus, got a juice box and a graham cracker for the walk home.
Buying a pregnancy test at Walmart in the middle of the night in the middle of Tennessee is not really how I imagined my 25th year on this planet starting out...
Can you please come and collect your boss off of my kitchen floor.
I need to find another hobby that doesn't include being hungover.
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
I got so drunk last night I took a ice bath with my mother in law
Where you been?
Please tell me this is a booty call
i just want to cuddle, make out and maybe have a boob grabbed but no. someone has to have mono.
Randomize
