The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
Some bum walked up and watched me getting head last night for like 5 mins before I noticed him
She was narrarating everything she did.. like while making toast.
So I had to explain to her that pussy doesn't mean a cat
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
It was some time between the gurgles of her blowing me to us throwing up in the same bucket afterwards that I realized we would be doing this a lot.
I woke up with $100 in my pocket and I was so excited until I found an atm receipt for a $500 withdrawal. Not as exciting.
Get you some cowboy.
In that sentence you are the cowboy. That is not saying you should get a cowboy for yourself.
They flooded the bathroom and their version of cleaning it up was to throw our couch cushions on it. That's when I decided to chug tequila and go drunk bowling. So hitting the kid with my ball is really their fault.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also I just sneezed literally 12 times in a row so violently...boogers everywhere. Sorry to ruin the sexting. I just felt like you had to know
Yeah well you try taking nice pictures while you have pizza crust lodged in your throat
He looks like he was the one that always had koolaid stains around his mouth as a kid, he can fuck off.
Dude I'm hungover as fuck in a bed in Baltimore with another man... I don't think I can make it.
I think I've had more sex in your bed than you have and I've only been here three days
as a guy is it bad that even my mom called me easy?
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