there should be a rule against ugly people hooking up.
yeah...but then what would the ugly people do? hook up with pretty people? yeahhh..don't see that happening in the near future. plus i'm not okay with that.
Sitting in class thinking wow im glad im not hungover...and then i realized im still drunk.
No flights in Europe due to the volcano erupting. God himself is telling me to spend 4.20 in Amsterdam.
He told me that if his bed could talk, it'd write a medical journal. Guess it's too late to worry about that now.
She told me my pubes were as soft as "fine wool"
took adderall before wrapping presents, ended up making paper snowflakes for two hours
After I was arrested and in the back of the squad, she lit a cig. I politely stuck my head through the glass opening and asked for a drag. She instantly slammed my head back, blew smoke at me and shut the glass. My view on state trooper chicks is forever tainted.
Nothing. Its like my body doesn't know how to function on a Saturday when its not hungover and/or still drunk.
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
I told my parents how nice the girl at the frogurt store was. I neglected to mention that I nearly lost my virginity to her via foursome.
I'm still here... I feel so bad wearing your mom's cardigan at a strip club 🙈
Wanna get drunk and play candy land? If so you are 2 steps behind.
I just found peanut butter between my boobs. This was for you.
Sorry about you walking in on the whole nude kinect dancing. The new roomie was drunk and naked and told us he was either over dressed or we were under dressed for the party. And Amy figured it would be easier to join him than it would be to dress him
She was blowing air into green onions and tying knots in them to make "balloons"
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