If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
you came home covered in oatmeal wearing a tutu holding a stolen wrotting pumpkin and "its a girl" balloons tied around your neck.you were whispering the lyrics to aaron carters 'aarons party'. i think the real question was what DIDNT you drink last night
season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
His best friend walked in while we were banging, turned on the light, yelled BURN, grabbed his computer to play the Thunderstruck drinking game, turned off the light and left.
do you remember the combo for the lock to my pants?
No more Raisinettes before sex. That's what happened. I just put it together
Neither of us have work tomorrow and we live w/n walking distance. This is your official Sandy booty call. Come rock me like a hurricane.
You know you're hung-over when you're smoking and have the strong urge to eat the cigarette. No more buckets of gin. No. More. Ever.
Do you remember making out with the dude in the back of my cab last night?? You said his mustache tickled your tongue.
and yet oddly the jello shots tasted better coming up than going down
SOME DUDE PUT OUT FOR A MCCHICKEN AND YET YOU STILL WON'T FUCK ME
No dude 10 parakeets in your bedroom is 9 parakeets too many. Bring them back. Today!
She super glued his penis to his testicles. And shaved off a good portion of his hair after he passed out at the party.
He got mad at you last time bc you tried to rap battle him via text. This is strictly business.
Randomize
