Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
SO stoned. Sitting in just a thong in front of a fan. NO work for a WEEK! Life is good :)
Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
If you're going to outback I'll have to decline, I've slept with a large enough portion of their staff already.
Dude, just look at these fucking curtains and chill out.
So help me Jesus we're never drinking together again. But weekends don't count. Amen.
He is the one I "technically" lost my virginity to.
I feel like you never had a virginity..
I remember trying to cut the power to a house I thought was "too bright to understand the meaning of christmas". Pretty sure I blacked out down the street.
Current status: Finding an unwrapped portion of Subway sandwich in my purse at the pharmacy counter & picking pieces of tomato off my wallet while the pharmacist watches disdainfully.
Did you offer her some?
If only. Current status: Not that clever.
You can't do wine Netflix and blow jobs in the bed you've had since 5th grade with your parents downstairs
I was giving him a blowjob but we had to stop because he started crying when his cat walked in and started staring at us
Herpes is not a lady problem you can solve with shower beers and kissing boys
I walked out ot my car in the morning thinking there was a sandwich I left there from yesterday. Then later that day I was checking the mail and saw the other side of my car :/
It concerns me the most that u were potentially going to eat a day old car sandwich.
THIS IS NOT A LAUGHING MATTER, CAITLIN. MY PARENTS ARE FUCKING. LOUDLY.
Getting on a bus with a beer pong table. I am proof we can make this campus fun.
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