I wanna passion pit in your ass
I can practically hear my vag and my conscience fighting.
how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
I just did the math. 30.36% of girls I've slept with have cheated on a significant other while doing it.
Some guy just bought a handle of cuervo, a curling iron, and a power drill. Paid with a jar of change. I'm torn between avoiding him and befriending him..
yeah a little bit of me felt bad about it. But the rest of me was having sex with him.
Bren left me with a lovely parting gift. Newfouund alcoholism. I'm on the kitchen floor, hugging a bottle of vodka. It's my only friend now.
Made a holiday JibJab of all my fucks. How's your night?
I yield to the immortal wisdom of one ludacris, who famously wrote, "can't turn a hoe in to a housewife." Indeed, ludacris, indeed.
Is it weird that I'm looking up pubic hairstyles?
last thing I remember is yelling 'sit on my face' through a traffic cone
I'm only friends with her because I can't stop watching the train wreck.
My sexual preferences tend to require a degree in psychology to understand
You were laying on the floor coloring a "get well soon' card for your liver...
I swear to god, if you ever yell my name during sex with my sister again..your balls will be stapled to your nipples.
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