hey soul. what's that? you, dignity and pride are left for the night? coulda told me that before i vomited all over my mother.
I think my vagina has grown over, not unlike earring holes when not used in a long amount of time.
Well I just put wine in my tea
Just woke up. Naked. Under an animal pelt. With a girl. I've never met her. She's pretty naked too.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Want to do me the honour of waxing my legs again before I go to Mexico? I feel like it's a tradition we shouldn't break.
Just banged your ex. So it really is 'him, not you' in that he's gay. Rodeo champion gay.
Great. I broke up with him before he could like my selfie, now I'm down a like.
I have a black eye again and dont know why again
I'm currently in h&m wondering "what exactly is the class level of a swingers resort?"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
somehow getting chased by a bulldozer was NOT on my to-do list for today. just saying
You left me with 12 red bulls and a bottle of vodka. What did you expect?
Sorry for face licking, I probably won't do it again.
Also, I love cats. I sat on the floor and they sat with me.
I might be a bit late, couldn't find my pants and had to go to the police station. Unrelated
Dude just saw some some guy puke out of a car window on the highway going to school.
I hate when he takes the condom off to cum all over me. It defeats the purpose.
It’s like having a barf bag and choosing to puke in your own lap.
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