OH RELAX, IT WAS PITY SEX.....
no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
someone needs to make a hangover cure that isn't cocaine.
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
She's a virgin AND a minister's daughter. We're one schoolgirl outfit from the dear penthouse trifecta
I started sorting laundry at 6 am. He finally got the hint and left
I'm sorry i ruined our friendship with a boner
Do you know how hard it is to maintain a conversation with someone who just told you they put their cat in the fridge on purpose?
Bro she gave me the stare. It's like she boned me with her eyes. I'm going in.
That freshman guy that keeps trying to hook up with me just saved someone's life ... Should I reconsider?
Well he's a 33 year old furniture salesman that picked up at 19 year old buying a bedroom set for her room. I can see how that would be awkward
That dude with the beard walked up to me, turned my water into wine with everclear and kool-aid, and walked away. Pretty sure drunk Jesus is back.
Dude it's 6 am and you just invited me to a hotel with a shit ton of coke. Best morning ever
If I hear the phrase 'these unprecedented times' one more time I'm putting my foot up someone's ass.
Randomize
