all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
Is it bad everytime a fat person orders fraps I want to tell them to slow their rolls
there's no toilet paper. I'm using wheat bread.
is that a crab cake on the shelf with the dvd's....?
You were yelling at the cops across the street saying they were at the wrong party
hiding in a bush to avoid a seven dollar cab ride. cabby got out a flashlight and looked for us for like an hour. help.
Is there any chance I can see you without pouring vodka on your head?
Someone just got kicked out of the mall for being dressed like a giant cat. I feel like this is in your future.
The hypnotist is here. He has a black eye and smells like tequila.
did you know that my friend knows a guy with 3 balls what the actual fuck
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
The majority of the reason I want to get my pilot's license is so I can use the argument "FUCK YOU! I'M A PILOT!"
I smoked a joint in the bathtub at 8 am then went back to bed
You wear a dinosaur suit one time and everyone thinks you're a furry. Fucking hell, man.
Oh I'm sorry does your girlfriend send you better pictures of things in her ass? No? Didn't think so. Remember that the next time you wanna complain how I don't make the first move enough.
Randomize
