I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
He's a firefighter, who has his own band. I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
I just threw up during my phone interview for the largest PR firm in the world.
We played shuffleboard at the bar last night...another sign we are getting tooooo old.
in my lab write-up should i mention that i watered my plant with tequila?
hiding in a bush to avoid a seven dollar cab ride. cabby got out a flashlight and looked for us for like an hour. help.
Slutty costumes are my most sacred holiday tradition! Wearing a not-slutty costume is like putting cheezwiz on a communion wafer.
Two drag queens are fighting over me. And yet the night is still getting weirder
Am I a bad person for getting my ex to DD me and a random hookup home last night?
You get home okay?
I'm pantless and in bed
That doesn't mean you're at home.
Yeah then you killed that bottle of Bacardi in under 20 minutes. So much for being an organ donor.
Yes. He better. Or I will shave a penis into his beard while he sleeps.
So far in 2016 I told someone id give them a blowjob for lasagna.
Considering what happened last night and how horrible I feel, I look amazing
I feel like your boyfriend deserves to know that you're a lesbian.
Randomize
