He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
i woke up and my collection of plastic neon wayfarers were half-melted in the microwave. my drunk self hates my hipster self
so...he totally just used scissors to cut up the weed. a wet paper towel to moisten the blunt....and a blow dryer so it wouldn't be wet. this dude either has the worst case of OCD or has the potential to be the next martha stewart.
I really need to find a new way to reward you other than head scratches, nutella and blowjobs.
I jumped on his cock in 2 seconds flat. Thanks mom for sending me to gymnastics when I was a kid.
Think I just saw your homeless guy on High Street. Did you give him back his crutch?
I wanna throw up and cum in that order
You are not allowed to borrow my car ever again. It smells like a hobo orgy happened in my backseat with a hint of onion. What did you do.
I just invented spray cheese vodka. tastes real nasty but does the trick.
You may genuinely find a use for the siphon. But the bag of human hair is less likely.
If I was banging all the guys that people think I am, I'd quit buying batteries.
I'm good. Got my nipples pierced and threw my back out. 🙌
Hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking you had a pulse
My throat is burning
Thats because you proceeded to drink the salsa because you thought it was alcohol...dumbass
It’s a prereq for med school, so I hope the professor likes blow jobs
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