Call me so I can make it juicy for ya
the girls im babysitting are trying to see how much jello they can swallow without chewing...their future boyfriends are lucky
The only thing I really remember is repeating "I hope I still have a job on Monday". Oh and pulling my boob out of my dress.
So I take it the company Christmas dinner went well then...
Escorted a stripper to her car last night,and all I got was a "Thanks" and "Go Steelers."
I got lit on fire and andy went to jail last night. Totally unrelated incidents though.
I have no recollection of sleep choking you
he couldnt get it up, so i stole his lighter. i needed to have some reason to say the night wasnt wasted
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
You'll get a boner for sure
Way ahead of you. Kinda awkward while paying rent but hey
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
Give me a second. I'm doing my best but I'm drunk so for some reason fitting both my boobs in the pic is just incredibly difficult. They aren't THAT big. I'm just being retarded.
Totally just made a post sex emergency cupcake run. My life is awesome.
I just want to order a very large pizza and get very drunk and very laid.
You kept shouting about how you were the king of all bitches...and doors, for some reason.
I'd send you a picture as proof but I want to marry him some day and that would be a deal breaker.
Randomize
