Why do you have Season One of Reba in your underwear drawer?
Why are you in my underwear drawer?
i told the bartender last night that if the palace saloon made a calendar he would be every month.
I don't know how much more of summer my liver can take.
she walked out and i tried to get her to come back but i couldn't remember her name so i just whistled... future reference: that doesn't work
She didn't need to know her brother was thrown out of a bar for getting head on the dance floor. You're a shit head.
At one point he was so drunk he was carrying around a bottle of patron drinking out of it and falling everywhere and every time he spilled it he would scream "THERE GOES TWENTY DOLLARS."
well it got awkwardly quiet so i looked up, slapped his stomach, said "youre the best!" while pointing at him, and went right back to sucking his dick.
Drowning in science and also vodka. Hope you're having fun.
I'm sure there are thousands getting dick today in the name of independence
Plus my fingers were hella swollen from eating all these cured meats so it was like I was given it to her with Hulk Hands on
You are ridiculously similar to a unicorn, and I want to fuck that unicorn.
i'm not so sure everythign we did last night was legal...
it wasnt that bad
you tried to climb into my fireplace while screaming TO DIAGON ALLEY! we didnt even watch harry potter. it was bad
I was drunk in the shower and i decided to shave. Im now bleeding to death
I just put together something from IKEA so that’s mandatory oral for a week.
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