i totally forgot about the coupon that said i would show him how i pleasure myself.
how many princess gummy vitamins will it take to negate last nights drinking binge?
So I got a little fucked up on the punch, and made out with the family friend. Which is apparently morally reprehensible. I don't get that.
Shaking her cervix like it's the hottest ticket around
you handled that situation with as much grace as someone puking involuntarily could
Just walk-of-shame'd past fifteen little girls at summer camp. Take a good look girls, I am you in twelve years.
I distinctly remember seeing your nipples from the deck.
yeah, i'm not. but i'm ready for free bjs. it's just hard to find women who will give me a beej while i'm sobbing uncontrollably
I just had cybersex with some guy from the Netherlands for 2 HOURS instead of doing my History project...how's your break going?
No. You don't want this. When I threw up last night, it was so intense I went blind for about 3 seconds.
I just scored a new eye doctor and a date all in one email. BOOM!
I almost had sex in a public restroom last night in case you're wondering how much of a mess 22 is for me
BTW, Julia referred to you as a power bottom. Are you available?
But we made up last night and had unbelievably crazy sex tonight. I legit went blind for like 15mins from him choking me. It was awesome
Did I literally just offer a blowjob for help moving? Yes. Yes, I did.
Randomize
