Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
so that guy from last night texted me saying i flashed half of my extended family last night. so classy.
Let's just say he looked at my vagina like it was a rubics cube.
You drew a self portrait of yourself on his wall with sharpie.
She got a text from her mom saying "you better not sleep with him, we all know how he is". IV ONLY BEEN HERE A WEEK
It's cheaper then a lap dance and you get your hair cut.
He pulled out, and the resulting cumstain on my sheets is in the shape of a fetus. The irony of this is both awesome and terrifying.
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
A dude I dated in high school just put a status about National Coming Out day. I checked his relationship status. He is dating a dude. Hello, Friday.
I feel like my vagina was punched by chuck Norris, a Brazilian chuck Norris.
Update - might be back in your neighbor's good graces. She liked the framed photo I gave her of me on the tractor with my business out.
I never thought I would have to arrest my own parents on a sunday night
I changed his contact info to "NO" and a picture of satan
I'm sending you a dick pic. Ill tell the other ppl in this pancheros its cool
Don't send a pic of dick unless it's inside the burrito
I'm sorry, but if I hear stories of you getting fingered in the ass, and selling weed, you are not coming to my party.
Randomize
