i also saw a trio of peacocks walking along a sidewalk in hollywood today. i really hope im not tripping.
in the car goin home for fam dinner and he is silent... i think he realized how big of a whore his little sister is
Lets get really high and only speak Spanish to each other again tonight
bitch so ugly she owes me an erection
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You covered in salsa con queso would take care of all of my cravings right now
Dude just read our convo. Apparently I was talking to you while I was naked. She wasn't happy about it.
We didn't even make it to the door before they came out saying we weren't allowed in because of last time..
You just kept walking around in a circle saying "well played 6th street well played" before falling over.
By the power invested in me i promise you hot wedding sex at my wedding.
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I have got to stop telling people I was almost a prositute every time I drink
my roommates are pretty pissed at me. they sent me out for ice and i came back with a kitten.
You're incredible, and I'm drunk
If I'm able to walk tomorrow morning, I'm gonna be really disappointed with myself...
low point of the night : a cop just busted out laughing at me.
Tbh I’m not a vibrator enthusiast
But I am godly
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