so you masturbated because Oprah told you?
Is it gay to rub my penis between my butt cheeks and pretend that they're tits?
Wow! You need to get laid.
you know its a sad night when you can actually see and hear sitcoms on at the bar
The more I hate his personality, the more I love his penis.
someone just puked in the library. they put up caution tape. i totally underestimated finals week.
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
we were on a sandy mattress. i was wearing a sweatshirt with a poodle on it and eating a whopper jr. i wouldn't have fucked me either.
I can taunt you with whatever I want. Like batman and sex.
I need a new pic for your contact id. Because your boobs popping up when I'm having dinner with my grandma or, ya know, when kids have my phone isn't so good.
Do you remember ripping my condom off last night while yelling "I DEMAND MY MEAT RAW" like a Viking?
I just drove my booty call to his booty call, if that isn't spreading the love, I don't know what is.
His mom said he was in the ER and asked for prayers and positive thoughts. Apparently, me wishing the clap on him is not what she had in mind.
But what I'm actually thinking about is how everyone except me had sex on my bed this weekend and now I'm just sleeping in it with a 7 foot tall blue panda
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
For the love of all that is holy just take the tranquilizers Erica
Randomize
