Yay Minnesota! I can't believe there's now a US Senator who has taken more acid than we have
You act like this is the first time i've fingered two 17 year olds at the same time
there was this guy running across campus barefoot in the pouring rain stepping in all the puddles. i want his life. and i want to be stripper.
Just saw a crackhead get taken down by pd in the canal. Its offically spring
He kept coming back from the bar with hotter girls and just left with two...I feel like I just witnessed something amaZing. Like meeting Jesus and finding out he has no morals either
We just for robbed for the second time. I believe the only thing I have left to my name is my $75 dildo
Hey. I thought you were saving your 80s playlist til marriage.
Well for starters the people who just made my burger at the grab and go just told me to "hang in there"
Her idea of a bathing suit is... well.. she might not actually even know what one is. I've only ever seen her in a pool drunk and fully clothed or attempting to get into a pool but tripping over her pants which are at her ankles. Drunk.
I fell asleep masterbating while watching family guy... This is what happens when girl's night gets canceled
Strip Simon Says: DO IT
the girl next to me was drawing sonic the hedgehog on her exam what the fuck
godspeed
Also, you fell asleep with you hand on and around my cock last night.
u better not lose ur virginity to a sugar daddy who doesn’t post a pic of himself to tinder
she referred to her cum as “pussy butter” so needless to say we had a good night
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